Wednesday, July 29, 2009

Rochester's Most Baffling Commercials # 2

First off, I want to tell you how important it is to know that your legal assistant could jump out of the TV set at any moment and beat the living crap out of you. It brings great comfort that my lawyer studied under Attila the Hun and

Notice the offers he is giving: Ripping out hearts and decapitating. He regrets that he cannot commit murder 1, but he is willing to put a bounty on the head of the victim and cause major paralysis through squeezing. Jim is not afraid to drop his dreams of ending your life and compromise for just making you a vegetable.

In one of his more tender moments, Jim, admits that he just wants to help. Similar to Mice and Men, how Lennie just wants to pet and hug the cute little rabbits, but ends up killing them in his death grip. Jim wants to give you legal action, but cannot promise he won't murder anyone. You have to honor a guy who is not afraid to get entrails on a good suit.

Lesson: Jim honors the improv code of torture. He is committed and ready to rip off heads and stab hearts. I could sit all day and watch this man destroy a wicked city. Similarly, the audience likes to watch good torture. It's our primal side that loves to watch the hero squirm. So do not hesitate to give someone a "good mourning." It might be the gem of the show.

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